Finding Ramona Again
There is a reason I work with teachers and mentors, and often it is because they call me to work more deeply with themes that my inner wisdom has been coming up with on her own already. But they ask me the questions that I haven't even thought of. We don't know what we don't know right? For me I have been really reflecting on joy, creativity and my inner little girl. As we come into summer which for me means a little more spaciousness and spontaneity I can more easily embrace playing, and messing around like my inner little girl wants me to. I have been ignoring her and her needs for far too long and she is letting me know in big and small ways. Have you been ignoring her?
I invite you to slow down and spend time with your Inner Little Girl and ask her what she wants and needs. It may be play, but it also may be love, a hug, and sometimes if our childhoods were not easy she needs to feel safe. And it is your job as the "adult" to give her those things, especially if she didn't get them as a child. Otherwise, the patterns she formed then to stay safe, are still around now. I was invited by two different teachers (funny how that happens) to spend more time with her, and dive a little deeply, because your little girl is a pretty big indicator as to what your essence is and what brings you joy in the present moment.
So when I was asked about my essence, I came up with Ramona....smart, inquisitive, mischievous, she never stopped talking, and she was a bit of a pain in the ass. That about sums it up, but I had to go back pretty far back to find her. Being an only child, from a divorced home, I feel like I became an adult around the age of 9 or 10, I became serious, had to feel in control to feel safe, and be focused on school work. Doesn't sound like much fun does it. Don't get me wrong, I always had a level of fun, but it was much more "mature" than joyful play. How far back do you have to go to find your little girl? I am ready to embody my Ramona, I am ready to reclaim her. I even hunted down my son's version so I can re-read her story. I am ready to play, and be joyful, and carefree. How about you? I think this world would be a much better place if we all did a little bit of that. Rather than asking our kids to "adult" we should be asking our adults to "kid".
I also realized thanks to my mentor that when I made that transition from Ramona to "adulting" at an early age, I put a bit of a wall around my heart. A protection. One I have done a lot of inner work around making more permeable, but still I resist to protect. It takes me time to really let people see me, and yet I carry the truth. I never hide my truth, but it doesn't mean I let people inside to comfort me, and let them see that I need them. How bout them apples? I really thought I was done with that, but there are still pieces and Ramona is going to help me burst wide open. So this summer in my life and in my work, it is all about playing, fun, and joy. I hope you will join me, there is plenty of time to be a serious adult later. So I do have a party invitation for you if you're in the area. Please join for a day of being a child and having a messy paint party! Brushes are not even needed. Fingers, toes, sponges, bubble wrap, slinkies, who knows, and maybe we will pick up a brush maybe we won't.
If you are in Denver, come play with me here!